I did it!!!

Earlier this week I called NASM and ordered my personal trainer study materials. I have about 170 days to study and take the proctored exam. I'm honestly not sure if I am more excited or scared. The first few chapters are biology and anatomy. My friends who are already CPTs say I probably know more  of the material than I  think.

Hopefully this will also get me one step closer to a job at the Y. Several attendant positions should open up as the college kids go back to school. The pay sucks, but I won't go home smelling like greasy burgers and fries. Even if I only get one shift a week, I get free membership. That's worth over $100 monthly.

Loving my reflection... Finally.

I'm finally getting to a place where I love my reflection. I've spent so many years loathing it.

I've been at least chubby for probably 75% of my life. My perception of how i look is skewed too. For the longest time, I didn't feel fat, so seeing the fat girl in the mirror was upsetting. Going to buy new clothes usually made me want to cry :(

Once I started losing weight and getting tighter, random people at the gym started approaching me and telling me how great I look. It happened again yesterday. For the longest time I was a little embarrassed and didn't know how to respond. Mostly because I didn't see what they did. Finally I stumbled on an article that said to disagree with someone who compliments you is rude because it invalidates their opinion.  So I started thanking people.

Lately I've been having these moments where I feel like I am finally seeing what everyone else sees. In the past, my eyes have always gone right to my waist,and my love handles. A few weeks ago I was in a session with Superman and doing lat raises in the mirror. Checking form in the mirror, the first thing to catch my eye was the play of my shoulder muscle! And the other day I saw my reflection in the door of the grocery store and realized I am normal shaped now.

JC and Superman are a big part of the change in my self confidence and self image. Even when I felt like a blob, JC would tell me he saw my shoulder muscles emerging, etc. Superman, his opinion has so much weight because he is a bodybuilder and I've seen how hard he pushes himself. Regularly he tells me that I am the strongest female squatter he knows, or that he's impressed at my stamina with the workouts, or that I've got impressive leg flexibility. My favorite is when he told me I have great thighs (blush). That gave me SO much confidence! After that, I went out and bought 2 pair of short shorts to workout in.

How can I NOT love my reflection? These amazing men, who I love and respect so much, keep telling me how amazing I am.  Superman even made a beauty and the beast reference last week- basically told me I lift like a beast, but I'm a beauty.